Failure and success

Oh I was so disappointed

I went out out for my final week 9 run yesterday morning full of enthusiasm and excited to be finally graduating and I just couldn't do it!

My daughter and I had waited for the rain to pass before we went out and set off dodging the puddles but even though I was going really slowly I couldn't breath properly.

I've never found it easy to breath right while running and when I went out with Mr Locket on Thursday he pointed out at the end when we were running together that I was breathing very shortly so I really tried today to breath deeply but it didn't work.

Endomondo told me I had run my first mile in 12.44 minutes, then Laura said I had done 15 minutes and then I just stopped running and started walking. I hadn't planned it but I couldn't go on. I can't believe that the first time I have failed at a run was on my final run before graduating! Maybe I've just been lucky so far and not had a really bad run before.

I have been trying to work out what went wrong and there are a couple of factors that were different from when I normally run: I tend to run in the evening and this time I went out in the morning which may have had an effect and then I hadn't had much to drink before I set out so maybe I was dehydrated. Or maybe it is because I ran further on Thursday (33 minutes) and then went to the gym for quite a tough (for me) session later that evening. My legs were really tired on Friday at work but it wasn't my legs that let me down  - more my body and my breathing.

 BUT....................

 This afternoon I went out again - even more determined than usual to get to the end and although it was tough and although there were times when I ran REALLY slowly, I did it.  I actually ran the 30 minutes and finished the programme!  Normally I try to run a bit further once Laura has said it is time to stop - on Monday I went for an extra 2.5 minutes and on Thursday an extra 3 but today I was quite happy just to stop the moment Laura said I could - especially as I had put a real spurt on for the last minute of running and was going surprisingly fast for me.

I didn't therefore run as far as I had on Thursday - only managing 2.30 miles compared to 2.66, and I ran a lot slower as well, but I don't care.  I'm just delighted that despite the fact that I have always been completely exercise-phobic I have actually stuck at a running programme for 9 weeks and seen it through to the end.  I can't run 5k in 30 minutes - and I may never be able to, but I CAN run for 30 minutes without stopping and just a few short weeks ago that was beyond my comprehension.

And what is even more astounding is that I actually ENJOY it!  Not always while I'm doing it, I have to confess, but sometimes I do and the sense of achievement and all those lovely endorphins afterwards leave me on a high!

Go me! :-)